Spin Class Letters

Dear Spin Class Instructor,
Thank you for reminding me how much I love spin.
Sincerely, New Found Motivation

Dear "WOO" girl,
Please stop shouting "woo" after ever climb.  You sound like a hungry baby eagle.
Sincerely, My ears are bleeding

Dear Chatty Kathy,
This is spin class.  Not 'oh my god I have a story to tell you and you are just going die when you find out what happened last saturday and I am going to tell you right now during spin class"
Sincerely, Hey, you.  Shut up.

Dear woman wearing mink coat and knitting during spin class,
Huh?
Sincerely, Is this real life?

Dear girl on spin bike that just peddles and doesn't follow the instructor,
There are bikes on the gym floor for people like you.  Please use one of those for your "bike ride" instead.
Sincerely, You are taking up valuable space - and oxygen.

Dear Out of Control Cara,
If you smell smoke, it is coming from your flywheel.
Sincerely, Take a chill pill and put some tension on

Dear Out of Control Cara (again),
I really don't want to be there when your shoe comes out of the clip.  I will feel obligated to take you to the ER.
Sincerely, You are not allowed to bleed all over my car

Dear girl in the cute Lulu pants,
You have killer legs.
Sincerely, Can I have them?

and finally...

Dear everyone that walks by spin class and stares at us,
It is spin class, we are not holding a seance or something in this dimly lit room.
Sincerely, Keep walking